new york city.

6.26.19

As anyone reading this probably knows, back in March I decided to buy a one-way ticket to New York City.  With nothing but 2 suitcases in hand, I moved across the country to start a new life. I had no friends or family in the city. I also had no job. The end of a long term relationship and the dream to move to the city sparked the decision, and I haven’t looked back since. It was one of the most terrifying things I’ve ever done, but it has also been one of the most rewarding.

I got to New York City, and if I said I was happy when I got there, I would be lying. I’ve never been good with change, and this massive move was no different. I got to my apartment that I was subleasing in for the month, and I remember sitting on my bed that wasn’t my own thinking ‘what have I done?’. I honestly thought I had just made the biggest mistake of my life. I also tend to be incredibly dramatic and forgot that I could eventually go back to Michigan, lol.

Needless to say, I woke up the next day after a full night's rest and was ready to take on this new city of mine.

I spent the next few weeks interviewing, and all I can say is that talking about yourself in the same light over and over again, is truly NOT fun. It gets repetitive, and interviewing constantly is absolutely exhausting.

After a couple of weeks, I got hired with what I thought was my dream company. I got hired as a marketing coordinator with an all-female public relations firm in the heart of Manhattan. Our clients were interior designers and architects from all over New York City. I thought I had found the perfect job at the most incredible company, but after a month, I realized what I thought once was, was not. Long story short, if you’ve ever seen or read the Devil Wears Prada, you’ll COMPLETELY understand as to why I had it in me to walk out the door and never look back.

Exactly one day after I quit without having another job lined up, I got hired somewhere else. I get paid better, and I work with the sweetest group of people. I also work alongside kids which keeps me incredibly busy and gives me energy even when I don’t really have it in me. There’s something about working with kids that has always resonated with me, and for right now, this job suits me so well. I get to be my outgoing, bubbly self, and most importantly, I’m really happy.

Within the first month of living here, I realized that being happy was more important than anything else, and I couldn’t sacrifice that for a job that just looked cool on paper. I’m still trying to find my purpose here in this city, but for right now, I’m happy, and that is what’s most important.

I’ve also started exploring the idea of getting into the world of aviation as a flight attendant. I was thinking of all of the things that I truly enjoy in life; traveling and helping people being near the top of that list.

The first few months in this city has brought me so much joy. I found happiness again, and I really reclaimed all of who I once was and all of who I lost the last year or two of my life.

I’ve met some of the most amazing humans, and I’ve realized that there are some really cool people living in this place. New York City is so diverse, and it genuinely makes me so happy. I often say that you can look around on the subway and see every single kind of person imaginable, and that alone makes this city worth it.

On top of that, I live in what I feel is one of the coolest places in Manhattan. I live in Harlem, and to explain the love that I have for this place after living here for such a short amount of time is difficult to explain. I’ve fallen in love with it. Harlem feels like a small neighborhood in a massive city, and it’s great to come home to after the end of a workday downtown. My neighbors all look out for me, and I couldn’t ask for anything else. It’s a pretty incredible place to call home.

And duh, living across the country from my friends and family is incredibly difficult, but yes of course I FaceTime my mother literally every day. I also know that these are my young and crazy exciting years that I’ll never get back, so honestly, why not do what I’ve always dreamt of doing? I get to one day tell my kids that mama lived in New York City. How freaking cool is that?

I’m not going to lie when I say that looking back at what I did, and still am doing, I feel pretty damn badass. This is the Marissa that I always knew I could be, and I’m so proud of myself for becoming her.

And if this is the motivation to buy the one way ticket, or to move to that new city, or to let go of something you know is holding you back, let it be. It’s worth it. I promise you. xo, Marissa.